The picture you see is of my 92-year-old grandma with two of her countless great-grandchildren. She looks a pleasant woman, and indeed she is - but truth be known, she is a woman of great power and everyone should be a little bit afraid of her. For me, I'm most afraid when I am about to share pregnancy news with her. It seems an odd fear considering grandma gave birth nine times and her mother went through the ordeal a shocking twenty-one times (yes, twenty-one). So why in such a prolific family would I have this fear? Quite simply it is because grandma is a strange combination of a traditional Irish Catholic granny mixed with an intellectual feminist. Picture Gloria Steinem playing the part of Ma on Little House on the Prairie. While she outwardly greets my pregnancy news with joy, her eyes cry out "WHY would you have another baby in a time when women have CHOICE?" Fair question considering how things were for that generation of women. My grandpa worked several jobs as grandma ran a household, rendering her virtually housebound. Women at that time were so bogged down with the daily task of running a household there was barely time to even enjoy their children. Those were the days when a woman's status was defined by how early in the morning she had the cloth diapers hanging on the line to dry. As much as we all love our children, motherhood can be an isolating and mind-numbing task at times. It is no wonder grandma sometimes shakes her head and questions why a woman of my age and in these times would have six children. As I read through the entries to our BlogHer contest, one difference in our generation of mamas becomes abundantly clear: we have access to the Internet, and the Internet provides us with community. Even on those days when we can't escape the four walls of our homes and those walls are seemingly closing in on us, we can hop on our computers and find a community of support. For those few moments, we have a break from the loud monotony of raising our children. Mamas now blog and read blogs. We connect on Facebook. If at 3:00am I am wondering why my toddler has green poops, I will post it on a mama message board. By 4:00am I will likely have several responses, including some that simply reach out to say they hear my concerns. During the loneliest hours of motherhood, your virtual saviour is a click away. Our grandmothers did not have those faceless saviours. Sure, husbands like to mock our Facebook, e-mail, message board and blog addictions, but during these uncivilized years of raising kids we have to do whatever we can to remain sane. So log on and find the community who is waiting to greet you, embrace you and most of all be there to support you no matter what time of day or night.
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Submitted by Julie Cole on Mon, 02/09/2009 - 10:52
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Thu, 10/28/2010 - 22:00 — rjdoghouse
Here! Here! I say to the joy that online friends can bring! I have a small group of women across the globe that I've been in touch with for nearly a dozen years. They've been there for so much of my life - and while I've only "real life" met a few of them, they are all more than real to me everyday! I get your Grandmother's thought about Choice - but that's the beauty of being a woman today. We have choice - choice to be a mom of many, or few or none. If we are lucky, we have the choice to work, or stay home. We can raise our children in the family make-up of our choice. We are the luckiest women in history, I think, reaping the rewards of the paths that those before us laid. So if you decide to have another baby - i think she'll understand it was all your choice. And that as a Mom at home, you have more support 'out there' than any who came before us! Here's to the online world that helps keep us sane!
Thu, 03/18/2010 - 01:06 — momof6
How amazing that you have a great grandmother around! It is so true, the internet is my social life and I am so grateful for all the other moms out there who love it as much as I do and are so supportive! I love your posts and look forward to reading more.
Mon, 02/09/2009 - 21:30 — melljones
I love that she is 92 and looks so great. My grandmother sounds so much like yours.
Mon, 02/09/2009 - 18:31 — moet1973
It's so true. Sometimes I wonder how my mother can stand not having a social life. She litteraly lived for her family and still helps us all out. Her social life consists of going to her grandchildren's hockey/soccer/basketball/gymnastic events and going for tea at her children's houses. Not that I think that is a bad thing, i think makes us a very close family, but I wonder if Iw ould be able to go through life without all my girlfriends to chat with, or my virtual friends to reach out to.
Thankfully, there have been some other changes since granny's time... things like dishwashers, laundry machines, microwaves... it is so much easier (not easy, but easier) to run a house hold now then it was then. Gotta give it to our grans, life was not as easy for them, and they probably complained less about it!!
Sun, 05/29/2011 - 07:38 — cheapshoesonline
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Mon, 02/09/2009 - 17:24 — lauratcallaghan
Julie, I love reading your blogs...you always make me think about things and you raise some great ideas. My husbands family are all Irish catholic and yes I can relate to that frame of thinking. 21 children!!! Oh my! Times have changed haven't they. The internet is a super resource for moms...i have been reassured many times and had many laughs and oh yeahs! With one right now, I feel that I have more of social life than before but I can see how it gets much harder with more.
P.S. I saw the Mabels Labels as a fundraiser at one of the schools I was teaching at. cool! I will have to get some when my guy is a little older! They are awesomme for schools!!
Comments
This is a great post. you got cheap shoes online .I like cheap designer shoes as well give you designer shoes outlet http://www.cheap-shoes-online.org
Here! Here! I say to the joy that online friends can bring! I have a small group of women across the globe that I've been in touch with for nearly a dozen years. They've been there for so much of my life - and while I've only "real life" met a few of them, they are all more than real to me everyday! I get your Grandmother's thought about Choice - but that's the beauty of being a woman today. We have choice - choice to be a mom of many, or few or none. If we are lucky, we have the choice to work, or stay home. We can raise our children in the family make-up of our choice. We are the luckiest women in history, I think, reaping the rewards of the paths that those before us laid. So if you decide to have another baby - i think she'll understand it was all your choice. And that as a Mom at home, you have more support 'out there' than any who came before us! Here's to the online world that helps keep us sane!
How amazing that you have a great grandmother around! It is so true, the internet is my social life and I am so grateful for all the other moms out there who love it as much as I do and are so supportive! I love your posts and look forward to reading more.
I love that she is 92 and looks so great. My grandmother sounds so much like yours.
It's so true. Sometimes I wonder how my mother can stand not having a social life. She litteraly lived for her family and still helps us all out. Her social life consists of going to her grandchildren's hockey/soccer/basketball/gymnastic events and going for tea at her children's houses. Not that I think that is a bad thing, i think makes us a very close family, but I wonder if Iw ould be able to go through life without all my girlfriends to chat with, or my virtual friends to reach out to.
Thankfully, there have been some other changes since granny's time... things like dishwashers, laundry machines, microwaves... it is so much easier (not easy, but easier) to run a house hold now then it was then. Gotta give it to our grans, life was not as easy for them, and they probably complained less about it!!
This is a great post. you got cheap shoes online .I like cheap designer shoes as well give you designer shoes outlet
Julie, I love reading your blogs...you always make me think about things and you raise some great ideas. My husbands family are all Irish catholic and yes I can relate to that frame of thinking. 21 children!!! Oh my! Times have changed haven't they. The internet is a super resource for moms...i have been reassured many times and had many laughs and oh yeahs! With one right now, I feel that I have more of social life than before but I can see how it gets much harder with more.
P.S. I saw the Mabels Labels as a fundraiser at one of the schools I was teaching at. cool! I will have to get some when my guy is a little older! They are awesomme for schools!!